Every year somebody announces that red roses are cliché.
And every year people continue buying millions of them.
Perhaps the flower isn’t the problem.
Perhaps clichés occasionally become clichés because they work.
Nobody Misunderstands Red Roses
This is their greatest advantage.
Flowers have a language.
White can be elegant.
Yellow can feel joyful.
Pink can be affectionate.
Red roses are considerably less complicated.
They say:
I want you.
I love you.
I’m thinking about you romantically.
Possibly all three.
Sometimes clarity is attractive.
Men Tend to Overcomplicate This
You stand in the flower shop.
You wonder whether roses are too predictable.
You consider some obscure tropical flower because nobody else will have thought of it.
You start Googling Victorian flower symbolism.
Twenty minutes later you are considering sending a cactus.
Stop.
If the person you love enjoys roses, buy the roses.
Originality is overrated when the original is good.
But Presentation Matters
Twelve supermarket roses wrapped in cellophane and twelve beautifully selected roses arranged by a florist are technically the same flower.
Emotionally, they are not remotely the same object.
The wrapping.
The greenery.
The length of the stems.
The colour.
The way the bouquet opens.
All of that changes the experience.
It is the difference between cooking someone dinner and handing them an unopened package of pasta.
Ingredients matter.
Presentation matters too.
Timing Matters Even More
Here is the trick.
Red roses on Valentine’s Day are expected.
Red roses on October 17 are interesting.
Send them when there is no reason.
Tuesday afternoon.
After a great weekend.
Before a date.
Six days before your anniversary rather than only on the anniversary.
Unexpected affection has more surprise built into it.
And surprise makes things memorable.
The Card Should Not Ruin It
Please resist inspirational quotations.
Do not search “most romantic quotes ever.”
Write something you would actually say.
“Dinner tonight?”
“Thinking about you.”
“Still my favourite.”
“I’d choose you again.”
Or if you are feeling slightly less innocent:
“Wear the black dress.”
There.
You have done enough.
Clichés Are Not Automatically Bad
Champagne is a cliché.
Candlelight is a cliché.
Kissing in Paris is extremely cliché.
People continue enjoying all three.
The purpose of romance is not to win an originality competition.
It is to make the other person feel wanted.
Red roses have been doing a reasonably successful job of that for a very long time.